What am I going to do?
I can’t get air.
I can’t make blood flow.
I can’t sleep
Without spiraling
Back into this nightmare.
Waking up and tasting its sting.
I’m ready to be done.
I’m ready to be strong,
And kill the spirit that struggles inside me.
I want to bury it.
Smother it.
Leave it, until it’s stopped fighting.
Then, maybe I can find my way back home,
And end the pain
That follows me like this.
I want to be happy again.
Smother the spirit that fights.
It brought me here.
Even as I write the words, I cringe at myself.
Because I know the one writing this
Is the one I must overcome.
How do you do that?