I know you’ve been searching for answers. Until this point, you’ll only have known my words, and not the story behind them. And even that’s assuming a lot.
But if you have discovered my work, I guess you wonder what the point is? It probably doesn’t make much sense to you yet.
Well, I have begun writing 4 books for you: JEZEQUEL’S DEVIL, SHAMAN’S DAUGHTER, THE CEDAR FOLK, and AN ACCOUNT OF EULON.
They will each make you feel something different. And they’ll bring us closer, in spirit. You have no idea how much I hope you like them. I don’t know if you’ll ever read any of this, but in these days, I write a lot.
I have broken all 4 books into hundreds of small stories and poems. Some of them fit nicely into the books themselves. Others are just related by a theme, or the mood they bring.
I hope this isn’t all too much for you. I’d like to believe it’ll turn out to be something good for you, as it has been for me.
In life, I’ve tried to practice vulnerability in my art.
Sometimes, I’ve felt shame, for giving up too much of myself. But in truth, it was never that big of a deal. I bore my feelings and my dreams, and many people encouraged me. A few of my loved ones didn’t. I admit I’m sometimes sad about it. Eh.
In the end, I am so glad I left myself naked and exposed to them. Because it brings me to you, in this way. It transcends physical presence. I am always with you.
Young Seeker, feel no shame in your vulnerability.
I like hiding secrets for you to find, in the words I write, and the paintings I create. They’re like inside jokes that I make to you, from the outside. There’s even a couple of sculptures that are just for you.
They are your sacred mystery.
In life, I’ve believed in magic. The kind of magic that’s made through the realization of inspiration (and other kinds too). I hope we share that. You’re descended from magic. And your bones are dense with juju.
I’ve learned that it’s a superpower, To believe in something, no matter what most people say. And you’ll be hearing laughing, all your life.
You’ll hear crazy accusations, you’ll feel hostility sometimes, and have no idea where it comes from. It’ll feel strange to you. When people seem to hate believing. Even faith itself.
Young Seeker, believe in what you feel. And never deny your own truth. Never pretend.
You will look different. You will feel different. Because you are.
You are the one I was writing to, when I wrote the Cosmic Mantra and the Cosmic Mudra. I have memorized them both, so I could always remember the hope and the warmth you released into the chambers of my heart. You are made of so much. You are so small, yet so strong. Above all natural talent, above all blessings… What will serve you best in this life is that you try.
You never have to feel alone, no matter how different you look, how differently you think. You are one of a special kind. So many, yet unseen.
You are rare and beautiful to me. I see you through the eyes of the one who made you. You are like him.
Young Seeker, this is only a blink in time. Only a passing glance, at a universe that is ever-expanding, passing itself by. And it is profound, as deep and as complex as the mind with which you experience its splendor.
You will stare into the face of a miracle, in every mirror. You will hear repeated in every birdsong
“Listen, Listen, Listen”. And sing.
You are the descendant of the fantastic array, set high above your head. You are a Saint. And you are a Hero. You are a child of the verdant earth and the blood of the sea.
Young Seeker, there is no power, there is no machine, no potion, no deception so strong that it can cancel your bond to nature.
Return to her. And I will be with you.
I miss you, so much. I will keep lit my heart, for your shelter. It can’t be long. I will build something for us. My King.
Forever and ever, your Papa.